About a little over two years ago I was coming out of a very toxic relationship, my family and church were still recovering from a hurricane that had hit our island a few years prior, and I was disappointed with my career and felt like a failure.
I was deep in depression, full of guilt, shame, anxiety and regrets. My heart literally felt numb; like its light was fading away. On top of that, my body was sick because of all the turmoil I was going through.
It was around that time that I decided to go to the Internship at the House of Prayer. Being there in a way seemed like the world stopped and I was sitting with all my emotions and struggles; it felt heavy.
So I decided It was the perfect moment to sit with the Lord and tell him all that I was feeling. And honestly, I was angry at him. I spent months wrestling with him, pouring my heart, telling him everything I felt and thought without any filter.
I’m not even kidding, every day!! I thought everyone must think I looked crazy for crying all the time. I would start talking with the Lord about what I was struggling at the moment, and would just begin to weep uncontrollably and would ask him to heal my heart. I was determined to not let Him go until He answered me and set my heart free!
And He did that and even more! He met me so many times and answered a lot of my questions. He delivered me from depression and years of trauma and baggage, and I started to feel like the light in my heart was returning.
In a culture that is performance based, tears might look like a weakness. We often hold on to so much in our hearts just to seem strong. We have this need to look perfect and put together all the time. Even when we cry we apologize for it, it’s like we are ashamed of tears.
Friend, Jesus loves when we are real with him and we tell him, without any filter, what’s in our heart. He is not afraid of all our baggage and our big emotions. He is not afraid or intimidated with our questions. Nothing takes Him by surprise, He has seen it all already.
* Why do we hesitate then to come before Him in our weakness?? He is already waiting with loving arms to Hug us and embrace us.*
I believe tears are so special because they show up when words can’t; they end up revealing our true feelings. Tears keep us tender and humble, they ground us and makes us see how fragile we are. There is beauty in tears because they show our true self without any filters.
When we decide to come to Jesus and weep, it’s like somehow tears are like a language that says how desperately we need God. When we come before the Lord just as we are, in our brokenness and weakness, and we cry to Him, those tears don’t go unnoticed by Him!
Believe me when I say that he takes every single one of our tears and turns them into a harvest of deliverance and joy!
bad things might keep happening to you and you feel like the world is against you, maybe things have happened to you that you feel were unjust, or maybe you just have some baggage that you need to address and your running from it.
Whatever it is that you are going through, don’t be afraid of those tears; go before the Lord, pour your heart out, cry to Him. Those who cry and show their emotions before Him are the courageous ones. He hears you Friend! Keep showing up with your tears. In good time He will bring out of your tears a harvest of joy and healing!
Hi everyone! my name is Gabriella but you can call me Gaby.
Welcome to my blog!
I created this space with the purpose of sharing what the Lord has put in my heart in a way that is as real and genuine as possible. I want to invite you into my journey of following Jesus and I hope I can inspire you in your journey of following Him too.
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